I want to run into the kitchen and beg the cook to tell me her secret. Maybe she’s a Black Country witch.
I created this ice-cream for my lovely stepdad who is the best father a wench could ask for.
I don’t think I’ve seen so many animals in one place since that time at Dudley Zoo when I got my arse stuck in the chairlift.
With my foamy moustache of stout head, I wrapped my lips around pork and ham. It was a beautiful moment.
I often wonder about that poor Black Country wench who’s annoyed that her freezer is still broken!
We am so awash with our precious Punjabi jewels, that even Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are casting an envious eye across the ocean.
Well that’s if Elizabeth Bennett had a penchant for beer and scratchings, and managed to pull the drunkest person in the Black Country that is.
I’m sure our souls will need saving at some point during the evening.
The Bride wasn’t half yampy as well.
So who broke my heart on Saturday night? Well it wasn’t the Dudley Beer Festival. Or the Dog & Partridge.