I want to run into the kitchen and beg the cook to tell me her secret. Maybe she’s a Black Country witch.
I don’t think I’ve seen so many animals in one place since that time at Dudley Zoo when I got my arse stuck in the chairlift.
I was too busy fighting them off my Mo-Hi-To.
Wench #2 decided he was a definite serial killer which was a little disconcerting as he kept trying to hold my hand and I left with his phone number.
With my foamy moustache of stout head, I wrapped my lips around pork and ham. It was a beautiful moment.
Well that’s if Elizabeth Bennett had a penchant for beer and scratchings, and managed to pull the drunkest person in the Black Country that is.
I’m sure our souls will need saving at some point during the evening.
There was no sex for us, but they do say it’s wrong to exercise on a full stomach.
If you’re thinking of breaking into the safe you may need to bring your stepladders.
So who broke my heart on Saturday night? Well it wasn’t the Dudley Beer Festival. Or the Dog & Partridge.